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Dating Apps: Helpful or Harmful?

Do people actually meet their husband or wife off dating apps? Are dating apps really helpful? Or are they harmful? These are questions we are always getting from singles looking for true connection in their relationships. In short: dating apps can be helpful and harmful. Here are some guidelines to follow when using dating apps. 

How to get the most from dating apps 

  • Meet in person quickly  

    • Communication over technology does not provide a true connection. The quicker you meet, the quicker you can see if you enjoy their company.  

  • Be true to you 

    • Make your profile like you, suggest a date you enjoy, and be honest about the type of relationship you are looking for.   

  •  Don’t immediately look through their social media 

    •  It is easy to get a skewed (positive or negative) perception this way, remember people are very selective of the information they share.   

And of course, always, always safety!  Meet in public places, drive yourself there, and let someone know where you are and when you’ll be back.  

When dating apps are harmful and it may be time to take a break: 

  • It feels like a chore/you are getting frustrated  

    • This may be a sign it is time to connect more face-to-face with friends and family or spending time doing things you enjoy. It is okay to take a break. 

  • You spend a lot of time liking/swiping/hearting  

    • It is important to invest yourself in dating and in yourself. Make sure to keep up your regular self care 

  • Your self-worth is hurting  

    • It is important throughout dating that you continue to find your self-worth from things YOU create (e.g., your job, other relationships, hobbies,) not from other people looking at your profile.  

  • You are liking/swiping/hearting people you would never want to meet in real life  

    • This is likely to only give you a “quick fix” of feeling wanted or desired and will probably lead to more hurt and disappointment in the end.  

There is nothing wrong with looking for a partner on dating apps. The most important thing is to be mindful of your mood towards dating and how you’re feeling about yourself.  If you’re feeling excited, nervous, and connected to yourself then keep it going! 

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